The setting is modern day Los Angeles, inside a building begrudgingly shared by diametrically opposed basketball teams.
Exposition:
After playing three games in four nights, the Los Angeles Lakers are a bit weary. They are carried into the game by their aging yet rejuvenated superstar, Kobe Bryant, who has scored at least 40-points in three straight contests and has looked dominant doing it. Their opponent — the Los Angeles Clippers — are on a streak of their own after defeating the league’s best team in the Miami Heat. Even without sharpshooter Mo Williams, morale runs high leading up to the battle for Los Angeles.
Rising Action:
Our protagonists (Blake Griffin and Chris Paul) come out absolutely on fire. Griffin displays his versatility in the Clippers’ first two scoring possessions by striking from distance with a jumper and then by attacking the paint with a sweeping, jumping righty hook over Pau Gasol on the very next play. Griffin and Paul continue to alternate control for the quarter (they assist on or score every bucket except one), but not before Griffin makes a statement of sorts on the defensive end. As Lakers rookie point guard Darius Morris flies in for a dead-ball dunk after a foul on the perimeter by Paul, Griffin stands near the hoop waiting. He’s taken exception to teams shooting in dead-ball spots this year (he’s our Kevin Garnett, just face it already) and so when Morris soars in for the dunk, Griffin gives him a little shove in the ribs. Sort of like a “what are you doing, rook?” push, nothing malicious, but enough to make Lakers coach Mike Brown wig out and almost get tossed from the game.
With the intensity raised a notch, Chris Paul restores order in the quarter’s closing seconds by connecting with a running, fadeaway bank off the glass, plus the harm. Just as the Clippers have seized control, Morris rips it right back with a heave from behind half-court that falls in. 31-24, Clippers after one.
Comedic Relief:
Sensing the audience needed things lightened up a bit, the Lakers and Clippers let their benches take the floor. Although many others contend for the laughs, no one steals the show quite like Brian Cook. After hearing boos upon his arrival, Cook’s improbable rise to prominence comes in the form of a big ol’ swat on Pau Gasol’s fingeroll. Sadly, his fifteen minutes of fame wouldn’t last nearly that long, as one minute later he rocketed a 3-point attempt off the front iron. Perhaps sensing his time in the limelight was coming to a close, Cook went for the glory and drove baseline from the perimeter (yes, this happened), attempting an acrobatic, highly difficult reverse layup in the trees. Blake Griffin was at the scorer’s table before the ball made it’s descent back into this solar system, and just like that, Brian Cook’s brief, hilarious yet saddening performance was done.
Buildup:
As Chauncey Billups rained in shots (4-for-6 from deep), Reggie Evans hauled in offensive rebounds (6 offensive boards) and Caron Butler played lockdown defense (11 points on 3-for-12 shooting for Bryant in the first half), the Clippers lead grew to double-digits with a minute remaining before the half. And just like the first quarter, Griffin found himself yet again in the middle of the fray. After blowing an easy putback chance, Matt Barnes picked up a technical foul for complaining about a push from Griffin that wasn’t called. Chris Paul once again immediately seized control of the game following the technical by nailing a jumper to give the Clippers a 55-42 lead at the break. Only in the movies does a 6-foot-10 monster of a man pick the fights, then let a 6-foot-nothing, tiny little guy settle the score for him.
Conflict:
Red Panda (AKA Bowl Flipping Lady) was not the halftime act.
Of course, there would be no drama if the protagonists weren’t confronted by an antagonist. Awesome montages can only last so long. Matt Barnes, while incredibly annoying, was not threatening enough to fill the role. Pau Gasol and Andrew Bynum are large and talented, but weren’t believable enough as villains. No — only one man would suffice.
You may be familiar with the work of Kobe Bryant. He routinely makes shots that are simply unfair — terrible looks that no player with a conscience should take. Ah, but that’s what makes Bryant so villainous — he has no conscience. He is ruthless, unbending, and at times, unstoppable.
As Bryant starts pouring in off-balance jumpers in the third quarter, the Clippers have no answer. Their stars (Griffin and Paul) can’t guard him. Caron Butler looks exhausted from chasing Bryant and can only do so much. The only answer is…
Randy Foye?
As Foye comes in to try and check Bryant, Kobe’s eyes get big and his jaw widens. The Blake Mamba has a mouse in the house, and it’s feeding time.
Butler checks out with 2:13 left in the period. Foye is left all alone with Kobe. So alone. So cold.
Kobe quickly rattles off 9 of his 21 third quarter points on Foye, and all of the sudden, the Clippers once seemingly insurmountable lead is down to four, 76-72.
Climax:
Kobe remains in the game — and so does Foye. Our protagonists (through no real fault of their own) look like they’re in an awful lot of trouble.
But then a funny thing happens. Reggie Evans chases down an offensive rebound (that’s not unusual) after a Randy Foye airball (that’s not unusual) and gives the ball to Paul with only a few seconds remaining on the shot clock. Most players probably don’t realize the situation, but this is Chris Paul. The Clippers have not had a single shot clock violation to this point in the season, and Paul doesn’t let them start now.
It’s a heave. Paul even does this funny leg kick, mainly because he’s chucking it from 34-feet. It’s just a prayer that Reggie Evans will run over three people and collect the miss off the rim or Blake Griffin will dive into the 17th row to save it and…
Splash.
It was a moment. Staples Center erupts, and the camera catches Paul turning to the opposite baseline, pointing and saying something. I have no idea what he’s actually saying, but I sat there wishing it’s like a kung-fu movie with terrible tracking and he’s saying, “I got this. Thanks for being patient. We’re not losing.”
Falling Action:
From that moment on, everything magically starts to click. Vinny Del Negro makes a great adjustment and has Foye front Bryant all the way around the court. When Bryant does receive the pass, the Clippers immediately double on the catch. Bryant, after all, is the adversary who still needs dispatching.
Tonight though, Bryant is not the hero — Paul is. When Paul gets switched up defensively and finds himself guarding Bryant in the corner on one possession, he puts his chest right into Kobe. He is going nowhere. He is all the same things Kobe is: relentlessly competitive and fearless. But what Bryant and Paul don’t share is the same tragic flaw. Instead of deferring or trusting anyone else to make a play, Bryant decides to do it himself by lowering his shoulder down and moving Paul out of his way. Offensive foul.
Right on cue, Paul delivers the dagger with a 3-pointer on the very next possession.
Of course, since Bryant is a vampire (blood transfusion in eastern Europe? Yeah, okay.) he needs a wooden stake drove through his heart, not a dagger. Bryant retaliates with another series of jumpers, but Paul and Griffin do the work on their end and finally put Bryant and the Lakers away for good.
Resolution:
Although he escapes as the winner, Paul doesn’t leave the battle with Bryant unscathed. He sits out the last few minutes with a pulled hamstring, but doesn’t leave the court until he knows the job is done.
Griffin, meanwhile, miraculously avoids another dust-up with the Lakers and finishes the night without feinting (45 minutes played). He proves yet again to be the perfect complement to Paul, carrying the Clippers offense with energy (22 points, 14 rebounds and 5 assists) for the majority of the game, allowing Paul to do what he does best in end of quarter situations.
The Clippers win over the Lakers has plenty of significance, but it wouldn’t be Hollywood if this rivalry wasn’t “to be continued.” In fact, I bet they’ll make this a trilogy. And you know what? The Empire will probably Strike Back. Maybe Kobe will recruit a new adversary and the Clippers will have to scour the galaxy for more Reggie Evans ewoks.
Regardless of all that though, the Clippers (and their fans) deserve to celebrate. They struck a decisive blow tonight. No — the Clippers will never have the rings and money and banners and everything else the Lakers have, but what the Clippers do have is a new hope.

26 Responses
Fun to read, another Great article! Thanks DJ.
Its always good to hear the other side of the story (where the villain is Kobe not his wife.) LALALand has so many biased reporters and its filled with sore looser and fans that are still crying over the Cp3 trade! Welcome to the new era! Its Clippers time!
Gotta give it to Vinnie, today’s unsung hero imho, He did a great job by calling time outs right on time and that call inthe 3rd or 4th to double team the ball hogger kobe. (seriously what a waste of bynum/gasol). Like any human Vinnie wasn’t perfect and his major flaw came when he put in Cookie. The team atempted to aid cookie in his extended drout but it didnt help. Cookie single handedly killed the clippers momentum! oh me oh my cookie!. (Great block but doesnt make up for the constant clinging u make me do, Yikes!)
Great story, Great team moment, Great night! Go Clips!
Posted on January 15th, 2012 at 6:57 am
We all know what happened when the empire strikes back but don’t get blake mad or he will unleash the cracken that has been lying in wait for a 40 plus game. Reggie evans the ewok lol. More like chewbecca becuz he is a beast
Posted on January 15th, 2012 at 7:02 am
Lol dug the read.
Posted on January 15th, 2012 at 7:56 am
Fantastic post – really fun to read.
Posted on January 15th, 2012 at 9:32 am
blake mamba? anyway, at this point i’d still trade randy foye for brandon roy
ClipsFan4Life Reply:
January 15th, 2012 at 10:15 am
Sad to say but i think foye has been a really big disappointment coming off the bench! I had high hopes for foye this year.
griffin Reply:
January 15th, 2012 at 11:40 am
Did you trade for roy? Roy is retired unless you meant you rather have roy
Clips4 Reply:
January 16th, 2012 at 10:11 am
You can’t really say that about Foye though. Foye has greatly improved as a player from his days with the Wizards. He no longer brings the ball up and dribbles to 7 seconds left on the shot clock before initiating the offense. He’s up against CP3, Chauncey, and Mo Williams. He is absolutely going to get lost in the rotation. You can’t say he’s been a disappointment when the guard position is so loaded he is finding trouble getting minutes.
Posted on January 15th, 2012 at 9:40 am
Nice post. I’m no lip reading expert but I’m pretty sure when CP3 pointed at the camera he said “you see that sh!t?” or something along those lines. They even cut the clip before the last word when they showed it on sportscenter.
Posted on January 15th, 2012 at 10:21 am
I’m really down to continue the whole Star Wars thing.
-Griffin is Luke, our young, hopeful protagonist.
-DeAndre is Chewbacca, the lovable, reliable giant beast.
-Paul is Han Solo, the tough rogue who arrives and takes Luke under his wing.
-Billups is Obi Wan, the bitter but reliable old man, who has seen it all and fought against the empire in his younger days, before the Jedi (those old Detroit teams) fell apart, and were dispersed across the galaxy.
-Caron Butler is Lando, because you’re never really sure if he’s on your side or if he will turn you in to Vader by chucking terrible shots.
-Donald Sterling is Yoda only for the fact that he is like 900 years old and won’t die already. (too far?)
-Not a Clipper anymore, but Eric Gordon is this guy http://tatooine.fortunecity.com/swampthing/97/nien_squinty_vcap.jpg
-Jerry Buss is the Emperor, for obvious reasons
-Kobe Bryant is Darth Vader-once human, and young boy with hope. Now he is all evil, and has survived countless injuries by being rebuilt to the point that he is half machine.
-Sam Cassell can be Admiral Ackbar
There are definitely more possibilities out there. Keep ‘em coming.
Neiru Reply:
January 15th, 2012 at 3:17 pm
That was awesome. You are a true Clipper fan.
D.J. Foster Reply:
January 15th, 2012 at 3:42 pm
This is the best comment ever. Also, I hate to bring the new movies into this but Brian Cook is so Jar-Jar Binks, you guys.
cdrumz Reply:
January 15th, 2012 at 3:57 pm
Except when Brian Cook tries to be offensive, he shoots a brick…
kamonster Reply:
January 15th, 2012 at 3:57 pm
It’s fine to bring the new movies into it if you’re showing how crappy they are. It’s completely necessary with Cook, because there really aren’t characters who are crappy enough from the original movies to be Brian Cook. He’s really just barely good enough that we don’t have to start bringing in characters from the novels…
kamonster Reply:
January 15th, 2012 at 4:44 pm
The Clippers organization definitely knows the about the Star Wars parallels. Why else would they play this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ehrj58nJBJI during the opposing team’s intros?
Steve Reply:
January 15th, 2012 at 10:38 pm
I love this but I can’t agree with Sterling being yoda… Maybe he can be Jabba the Sterling, evil overlord and profiteer of the LA basketball galaxy..
MadGlove Reply:
January 15th, 2012 at 11:44 pm
Agree. Everything else was great but this was off.
Sterling as Jabba sounds perfect. He sits courtside as his slaves dance around and entertain him.
So who’s Yoda? Soon our heroes will go seeking a great warrior to teach them the ways of the Force. A wise old Jedi who coached those who came before…
Clips4 Reply:
January 16th, 2012 at 10:34 am
We need a guy like Kurt Thomas, the elderly guy who has seen all and done all in his heyday, was an all-star elite player in his prime but is on his last legs and can play 5 minutes or so a night to give the main rotation players a break and is a good locker room guy who can mentor some of the younger players like Blake, DJ, Leslie, Thompkins, and Bledsoe.
Clips4 Reply:
January 16th, 2012 at 10:35 am
Mind you I know Kurt Thomas currently plays for Portland, but I meant a type of guy like him. I did NOT necessarily mean that it HAS to be Kurt Thomas.
kamonster Reply:
January 16th, 2012 at 12:50 am
I definitely hear that. The Sterling one was definitely more of a loose connection I felt like making about their eternal aging, but other than that, there really aren’t any more similarities. Jabba really is a better Sterling, good call. Cassell almost fits the Yoda roll (he’s even an alien) but I just like him too much as Admiral Ackbar. This is starting to get complicated fast.
Clips4 Reply:
January 16th, 2012 at 10:37 am
Cassell currently is an assistant coach for the Zombie Bullets in WAS. If Cassell was brought back as an assistant coach for the Clips, then he would fit the role of Yoda.
Posted on January 15th, 2012 at 12:13 pm
Awesome win. Paul makes everyone better even when he is not playing. No shot clock violations this season? That is ridiculous. Bryant makes everyone else worse although he is on my fantasy team so I hope he keeps hogging it.
I hate to belabor it, but I can’t for the life of me figure out why Brian Cook gets any minutes. His only contribution is hitting threes and he is not doing that. Trey Thomkins could shoot better than 0-14 or whatever Cook is in the last several games from 3.
Posted on January 15th, 2012 at 12:26 pm
Laker fans are going nuts on ESPN’s boards about Blake’s little love tap on Morris. I didn’t know so many people thought BG was a dirty player. I was already starting to see signs of KG in BG with all the theatrics and whining this season for fouls, but after seeing this http://youtu.be/nQrNYIBw3fw from last season I’m starting to get worried. I hope someone gives BG a reality check so he doesn’t end up the new KG of the league.
Posted on January 15th, 2012 at 6:35 pm
The Force is strong with this article.
Posted on January 15th, 2012 at 11:39 pm
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